More sad news for the music industry...

Justin Bieber was found alive and well at his million dollar apartment earlier today.

Sources close say he'd enjoyed an early night and hadn't bothered anyone until his potty needed emptying after he'd had his usual milky cup of tea.

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Teenage Chav, permanently connected to Blackberry and capable only of rolling eyes to be euthanised.

A big surprise awaits the boring adolescent who sat hunched over her mobile phone connected by earphones with her back to everyone at last nights gig in Sheffield, for the girls parents are fed up with her inability to communicate verbally and believing everything real to be 'gay.'

"She doesn't know it yet, but we're having the useless arrogant shit put down next week, that'll fukin teach her the stinking fukin chav!'

The case continues...




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